The Gulf
I was teaching my English class the other day, and I made a comment about the "Persian Gulf." Then I remembered that over here, they call it the "Arabian Gulf." So I said, "uhh... I mean, the 'Arabian Gulf'."
But it turns out only the Emirati locals call it the "Arabian Gulf." In that moment before I corrected myself, I failed to realize that three kids in my class are actually Persian and several more are Egyptian/Lebanese/assorted other. This group begged to differ.
"What do you mean, 'Arabian Gulf?'" they said, practically in unison. "It's 'Persian Gulf'." Eyes instantly widened beneath headscarves on the Arab side of the room. "Arabian Gulf!" one shouted.
This situation was so obviously fraught that even I could feel it going off the rails. I did what I always do in this sort of jam: I started drawing stupid pictures on the board.
It was a picture of England and France, represented by two blobs. In between them I drew little waves and a fish that looked slightly less real than the fish bumper sticker on the back of cars. "Do you know what the English call this water?" I said.
They didn't.
"The English Channel! And guess what the French call it?"
Actually, they call it "The Sleeve," but lying suited my purposes better, so I lied. "They call it the French Channel! Ha, ha!"
The class loved it. They're exuberant kids; that's what I love best about them. If you tell an even mildly funny joke, they roar in a way that American high schoolers wouldn't be caught dead doing. All together they laughed and pointed their fingers and said, "That's so stupid, England and France!" The Gulf was forgotten.
I think only one quiet kid saw the irony.
But it turns out only the Emirati locals call it the "Arabian Gulf." In that moment before I corrected myself, I failed to realize that three kids in my class are actually Persian and several more are Egyptian/Lebanese/assorted other. This group begged to differ.
"What do you mean, 'Arabian Gulf?'" they said, practically in unison. "It's 'Persian Gulf'." Eyes instantly widened beneath headscarves on the Arab side of the room. "Arabian Gulf!" one shouted.
This situation was so obviously fraught that even I could feel it going off the rails. I did what I always do in this sort of jam: I started drawing stupid pictures on the board.
It was a picture of England and France, represented by two blobs. In between them I drew little waves and a fish that looked slightly less real than the fish bumper sticker on the back of cars. "Do you know what the English call this water?" I said.
They didn't.
"The English Channel! And guess what the French call it?"
Actually, they call it "The Sleeve," but lying suited my purposes better, so I lied. "They call it the French Channel! Ha, ha!"
The class loved it. They're exuberant kids; that's what I love best about them. If you tell an even mildly funny joke, they roar in a way that American high schoolers wouldn't be caught dead doing. All together they laughed and pointed their fingers and said, "That's so stupid, England and France!" The Gulf was forgotten.
I think only one quiet kid saw the irony.
posted by Eric at 2:26 AM
3 Comments:
Tastes Great! Less filling!
Oh, wait. So, allow me to get this straight. You lied to the kids and told them it was the French Channel?
I see the SAT question now...
What do citizens of France call the body of water that separates the country from England?
I see another generation of impressionable young minds being spoiled. But then, I guess it happens to all of us sooner or later.
See, that is what happens when you try to bring material from other subjects into English...you angered the Geography-Teacher God, Mapman, and, as payback, he embarassed you. Tread lightly...
Hope you're doing well, and I look forward to some video games when you come back. - MG
Hi Mike!!
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