Gary Porter and the Mystery of J. Lo
My Chechen student had some trenchant things to say about the latest celebrity news. We were flipping through 7DAYS, Dubai's trashiest little rag, and he sees a picture of Julia Roberts.
"Do you know who that is?" I ask.
"Angelina Jolie," he answers promptly. As his teacher, this irritates me. Angelina?? It's obviously Julia!
Next to Julia is Brad Pitt. "What about that, do you know who that guy is?" I ask.
"Uhhhh... Bobby," he says. "Bobby... Beautiful." He has unintentionally created the finest nickname for Brad Pitt in history.
We turn the page and read an article about J. Lo, who has announced that she no longer wishes to be known as J. Lo. Evidently that was all a big joke that we, the public, just never really got. Now it's "Jennifer Anthony." She's not a diva, OK? It's time for the "real Jennifer" to take the spotlight, she says. Don't be fooled by the rocks that she's got, people.
M absorbs the article quietly and then offers an almost Buddha-like wisdom. He points at her picture and says, "Eric. She wery, wery... wery stupid."
"Do you know who that is?" I ask.
"Angelina Jolie," he answers promptly. As his teacher, this irritates me. Angelina?? It's obviously Julia!
Next to Julia is Brad Pitt. "What about that, do you know who that guy is?" I ask.
"Uhhhh... Bobby," he says. "Bobby... Beautiful." He has unintentionally created the finest nickname for Brad Pitt in history.
We turn the page and read an article about J. Lo, who has announced that she no longer wishes to be known as J. Lo. Evidently that was all a big joke that we, the public, just never really got. Now it's "Jennifer Anthony." She's not a diva, OK? It's time for the "real Jennifer" to take the spotlight, she says. Don't be fooled by the rocks that she's got, people.
M absorbs the article quietly and then offers an almost Buddha-like wisdom. He points at her picture and says, "Eric. She wery, wery... wery stupid."
posted by Eric at 6:02 AM
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