Haircut II: The Scalpbuster
Haircut II went much smoother than the original. I'm happy with the result, and nobody had to unbutton my shirt to get there.
Kathleen, you'll be happy to know that the dog-petter scalp massage of Haircut I was taken to a whole new level in the sequel. This time, the guy practically attacked my scalp, like he was pissed off at my scalp for some offense and was determined to make it pay.
It was like the drive-through carwash. First they rinse off your car, then they spray it gently with cleaning products. Then, without warning, the rotating brushes of fury descend, beating and smacking against your car so that you can feel the thudding in your feet. It's violent and frightening. This scalp massage was like that. It was awesome.
The guy's hand was like an out-of-control ceiling fan falling on your head. It was everywhere all at the same time. It felt almost kung-fu. I think this guy could have kicked even Jackie Chan's ass, if the contest were barbering.
Then the guy worked on my neck with a vibrating neck-massage thingy. Everything got blurry as my eyeballs bounced and churned in their sockets. It was the best haircut ever.
Five bucks. My horse race winnings covered it!!!
Kathleen, you'll be happy to know that the dog-petter scalp massage of Haircut I was taken to a whole new level in the sequel. This time, the guy practically attacked my scalp, like he was pissed off at my scalp for some offense and was determined to make it pay.
It was like the drive-through carwash. First they rinse off your car, then they spray it gently with cleaning products. Then, without warning, the rotating brushes of fury descend, beating and smacking against your car so that you can feel the thudding in your feet. It's violent and frightening. This scalp massage was like that. It was awesome.
The guy's hand was like an out-of-control ceiling fan falling on your head. It was everywhere all at the same time. It felt almost kung-fu. I think this guy could have kicked even Jackie Chan's ass, if the contest were barbering.
Then the guy worked on my neck with a vibrating neck-massage thingy. Everything got blurry as my eyeballs bounced and churned in their sockets. It was the best haircut ever.
Five bucks. My horse race winnings covered it!!!
posted by Eric at 6:42 AM
6 Comments:
You just described my year of haircuts in France.
Something is wrong - the pictures of your haircuts aren't coming through. Oh yes, not posted. Perhaps the result is not all that different from what we're used to?
Oh, you're one to talk, curly.
Haircuts are overrated. I have not had one in about 20 months. Eric keeps telling me not to cut it.
I have begged this man -- to the point of weeping -- to cut his Muppet hair before it's too late.
ANIMALLLLLL!
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