Federer

I saw Roger Federer, the top player in the world, play J.C. Ferrero -- the top player until he hurt himself a couple years back -- in the quarterfinals last night. I had never seen live tennis before, and I don't expect ever to see a better match again.

Federer came out to a huge ovation but immediately started playing like crap, losing the first set decisively. The crowd, though always polite, turned against him surprisingly quickly. But Ferrero seemed to crumble in the second set, losing it even more decisively. Ferrero couldn't stop hitting the ball into the net.

The third (and final) set was a battle royale, full of botched calls, impossibly long rallies and ground strokes so fast I couldn't even see the ball. It went into a tiebreaker in which the lead changed hands at least three times. Finally, Federer won 7-5. I wouldn't have believed a one-handed backhand like that was possible.

My camera doesn't have a fast shutter speed, so these pictures are blurry as hell. But I guess you can go to ESPN.com for good sports photography. Consider these... impressionist images of the world's top player in action.

Tennis at the Burj

Remember the Burj? Here's another picture to refresh your memory:

See the part that looks like the old Starship Enterprise, jutting out from the top? That's the helipad. But when necessary, it can be converted to other uses, such as when Roger Federer and Andre Agassi are in town:

Photo credit: Getty Images, whatever that is.

Notice that there is no fence or barrier between them and the ground. Don't chase after those balls too far, fellas.

I'm going to see the Dubai Men's Open quarterfinals tonight and tomorrow. Please, please, please let me see Federer or Agassi...

My Oscar picks

Step aside, Academy. The results are in.

My Oscar picks:

Best Picture: "Million Dollar Baby" (should win: "Sideways")
Best Actor: Jamie Foxx (should have been nominated: Paul Giamatti)
Best Actress: Annette Bening
Best Supporting Actor: Morgan Freeman
Best Supporting Actress: Cate Blanchett
Best Director: Martin Scorsese (should win: "Sideways")

Anybody disagree? Post below.

From the Brad and Jen files

Madame Toussaud's wax museum in London decided Brad and Jen would be perfect for a first-ever double waxwork. So the couple's heart-wrenching divorce recently had its literal counterpart: The wax museum had to chop apart the wax lovers -- presumably with a hand axe or chainsaw -- and the whole thing cost the museum 10 million pounds. Now Brad lacks an arm and Jennifer lacks part of her torso. Friends itself couldn't have done it better.